I don't deal well with confrontation. I literally do all I can to avoid it and, when that fails, I revert to the tried and true method of compromise. That I know. From my perspective, people fall into two categories - safe and unsafe. (And by safe I mean likely to act rationally/unlikely to turn on me simply because I am in the way of whatever it is they want.) It's a very black and white way of looking at things...a child's way. An adult has the ability (whether they use it is a subject for another post) to see the shades of grey within a confrontation, to understand that people are human and that they make mistakes. A child simply breathes the fear...of making a mistake, of being...noticed. The panic is...stifling.
I'm coming to realize that...parts of me, the real me, are still that child. That frightened child. Especially when confronted.My sole aim becomes to evade notice, to survive the encounter - it's a prey response...a child's response. And when the confrontation is over I pick it apart, trying to work out what it was that I said or did (or didn't do or didn't say) to cause the confrontation. Because I blame me.
Knowing this is one thing, applying it...a whole different kettle of fish.